With Wellsey’s help, June barricaded the office from within, wedging the door tight shut with furniture.
“Thank goodness we use 1960s style filing cabinets,” Wellsey said, “Instead of just saving shit on our computers.”
“Well that should hold the door,” June said, puffing. “There may be ninjas after the Prime Minister, but that should slow them down a little. I just hope the police can get in before the ninjas do. Also, how did my fairly reasonable life decisions lead me to this point, I just don’t know, thank you.”
Prime Minister Brett Blandson was conspicuously not helping move the furniture, choosing instead to glare with disdain at a solar powered ornament that sat on the floor. June sort of resented this, but she was also pretty certain that he would have gotten in the way if he had tried to help.
“Ninjas can’t walk through doors, can they?” Wellsey said.
“No, that’s ghosts.”
“Not unless they’re ghost ninjas. If ghost ninjas are after us, we’re pretty doomed.”
All the chairs were wedged against the door, so they all sat on the floor.
“I hear the worst thing about a ninja attack is the waiting,” Brett said.
“No,” June said. “The worst thing about a ninja attack is when they kill you to death with ninja weapons, you complete nong.”
“I really get tired of people like you telling us what’s good and what’s bad,” Brett said. “In this country we’re free to be killed by anything…”
“Oh, shut up,” Wellsey said. “We need to contact the outside. So when they open the security doors, the police know to come right to us.”
“They could use infrared detectors,” June said, “to spot the hot air coming out of this idiot. Or… Wait, I have a real idea that might help, though it’s less fun to say. I have some chemicals over here…”
“Why?” Wellsey said.
“I’m a scientist.”
“You’re a palaeontological educator. You don’t need chemicals.”
“Well I have some, okay? I can use them to make a coloured smoke cloud, send it into the air vents. They’ll be able to trace the smoke back to us…”
“Through the smoke-filled vents? That we already established are mostly impassable?”
“Well I don’t see you offering any ideas.”
“Well we can’t use our phones at the moment,” Wellsey said. “Because of the lockdown. But what if we adapted the transceivers to broadcast a short range SOS. The police won’t hear it now, but once the barrier is down, they will.”
June grinned an enormous grin. “Brilliant! Okay, get started!”
“Me?” Wellsey said. “I thought you were the scientist.”
“But I’m a paleontological educator.”
“But you said… Hey, where’s Brett?”
They looked over where Brett had been sitting. Instead of a greasy-jowled self-satisfied idiot there was… nothing.
“Did the ninjas get him?” Wellsey said, not quite keeping the note of hope out of his voice.
June shifted over to where the Prime Minister had been sitting. She poked around with her foot and jumped with surprise when a small section of wall swung outwards.
“He must have fallen into this secret door,” June said. “On the one hand, that’s probably the most interesting thing he ever did. On the other hand – shit!”
Wellsey sighed. “Come on, June,” he said. “We’d better follow it.”
“Why is there a secret door in…”
“Look, who bloody knows, alright?” Wellsey said. “All I know is that I’m the PR guy here, and if the Prime Minister dies on opening day that’ll be a hard one to hose down. So come on, like it or not we’re going after him.”