I went into this one not expecting to like it. I didn't care for Jurassic World, and frankly I only saw this one because it was showing at a time that was convenient for a babysitter. But, to my surprise, I liked it. Well, part of it.
My problem with Jurassic Park as a franchise, is that there's no need for it. Films pitting modern humans against dinosaurs go back to the silent era. Check out The Lost World,King Kong, The Valley of Gwangi, One Million Years BC, King Dinosaur, etc, etc. Jurassic Park was a step ahead of all of those movies technically. But in terms of story all it really added to the 'humans vs dinosaurs' canon was 'in an amusement park.' And that was fine, and it really was a good movie and deserves the love it gets.
Sorry once again to my tens of readers, but everything is super hectic for me this week and there may or may not be an update for Clocks and Boxes. If there is, it will be tomorrow at the earliest, but may be as late as the weekend. Either way, I promise it will make as little sense as usual. If you're here for the In Search Of reviews, I hope to return to my previous production schedule shortly.
In the meantime, let me tide you over with reviews of the last three movies I saw:
'Pottersville' is a bad movie even though it has Bigfoot in it. As anyone who has seen 'The Curse of Bigfoot,' 'Boggy Creek 2: The Legend Continues,' or 'Snowbeast' will attest, it is extremely hard to make a bad Bigfoot movie. Somehow Pottersville manages to achieve this difficult goal. Pottersville has a cast of actors who I respect too much to name here. It is bad.
Justice League Review
'Justice League' (2017) was crap, unless you like extremely dull, repetitive fight scenes in a grey-brown colour palette. The filming is so horrible that it makes a scene of two people standing in a field of corn look fake. I only recommend watching this movie if you paid for a copy of 'Green Lantern' and you need a superhero movie that makes it look good by comparison.
Carry On Camping Review
'Carry on Camping' is sexist, dated and plotless. Some of the visual humour is quite fun, but the verbal jokes sound like they were written by a bunch of sniggering teenagers and are delivered by comedians who could do a lot better and knew perfectly well that they were slumming it. Nevertheless, it is about a ten times better than 'Pottersville' and a hundred times better than 'Justice League'. Recommended.
9 is computer animated children's movie, perhaps a little darker and scarier than many children's movies but otherwise not especially memorable. The visual design is interesting but the plot is mostly runaround and the character development is
negligible. It does deal with some Frankensteinian themes (artificial intelligences, technology run amuck) but so do many sci-fi movies these days. What makes it interesting to me is a blink-and-you-miss it detail that moves the film from vaguely Frankensteinian to absolutely Frankensteinian.
9 (Elijah Wood) is a little humanoid robot, shaped like a rag doll. Immediately after his creation, his creator dies, leaving him in a little flat. 9 leaves the flat into a devastated world. There is no life anywhere to be seen, just destroyed buildings and the occasional corpse. In this world, he finds 2 (Martin Landau), another rag-doll creature, who has been searching for others of his kind. 2 is fascinated by a talisman hidden in 9's body. However, 2 is captured by a sort of robot monster and taken away to a sinister factory.
Nine finds his way to 2's home – a where more dolls live, ruled by the imperious and dogmatic 1 (Christopher Plummer). 1 forbids 9 from rescuing 2, but 9 convinces 5 (John C. Reilly) to come with him, and goes to the rescue. At the factory, they are joined by 7 (Jennifer Connelly), a warrior-woman ragdoll. 2 is briefly rescued, but 9 finds the place that the talisman fits, accidentally reawakening B.R.A.I.N., the AI that controls the factory. The dolls escape, but not before 2 is killed and his soul absorbed by B.R.A.I.N. ...continue reading "9 (Movie) (2009)"
Let me start by saying that this wasn't completely awful. Maybe all the terrible reviews I read had the effect of managing my expectations, but bottom line is I didn't hate this movie. I assumed -- rightly -- that it would be a pretty standard action runnaround through CG effects, like so many big budget movies nowadays. In fact, there were a couple of genuinely creepy horror moments, which I honestly didn't expect. The decision to have the Mummy discovered in Iraq rather than Egypt makes not a lick of sense in terms of realism, but thematically 'America goes to Iraq, unleashes horror' is surprisingly close to the original Mummy idea of 'Britain goes to Egypt, unleashes horror.'
Honestly, if this was a one off Mummy movie, I'd say it was adequate, if not especially memorable. Yes, the ending is awful for a whole lot of reasons. Yes, the gender politics are even worse than most horror movies. Yes, if I were ranking movies I'd seen titled 'The Mummy' it would probably come in forth. Even so, if this is the worst movie I see this year, I'll consider myself lucky. ...continue reading "The Mummy (2017) Review"
Victor Frankenstein (Samuel West) makes his Monster (Shuler Hensley), just as the angry torch-wielding mob arrives. We learn that Frankenstein's experiments have been funded by Count Dracula (Richard Roxburgh), who wants the Monster for an undisclosed purpose. Dracula kills Frankenstein, but the Monster escapes, only to seemingly die in a burning windmill.
Meanwhile, Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman) – a warrior for a interdenominational holy anti-monster order – is sent to defeat Dracula. He travels with Carl (David Wenham), basically a monkish version of Q. In Transylvania, van Helsing meets Anna Valerious (Kate Beckinsdale) a warrior woman whose brother recently died fighting the Wolf Man. ...continue reading "Van Helsing — 2004"
Last time we had a sort of general look at Metropolis, as it relates to early Frankenstein cinema. It's a big subject, and honestly I'm not going to cover all of it even with a supplementary essay, but I did want a closer look at two things. Firstly, religious symbolism and secondly the role of women in Fritz Lang's Metropolis and James Whale's Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein.
The novel Frankenstein is fascinating in that it is full of conscious religious imagery, but contains little sign of God's actual presence. The Monster is compared frequently to both Adam and Satan. Both are creations that rebel against their creator, with the difference being that neither of them is a match for God. The Monster is a match for Frankenstein. This is why the various attempts to make Frankenstein into a Christian parable tend to be perfunctory. A story in which a being, angry at its creator is able to stand eye to eye with that creator is simply unprecedented in the Bible. Imagine if Job could just get tired of arguing with God and kick him in the shins. Completely different story.
This, ultimately, is the point of not only Frankenstein, but a huge chunk of the whole science fiction genre: how do we deal with the themes and ideas invoked by religion without invoking God? ...continue reading "Metropolis – 1927 (Part 2)"
I usually like to give a fairly thorough synopsis of movies I review, but let's face it: this one is just too damned long. So short version: Joh Fredersen (Alfred Abel) is the leader and architect of a seemingly utopian art deco city. His son, Freder (Gustav Froehlich), is a feckless gadabout who does nothing but hang out in the pleasure gardens. When a woman named Maria (Brigette Helm) brings a group of grimy children into the garden, Freder learns for the first time that poverty exists.
He goes in pursuit of Maria, and finds himself in the underground factories that drive the Metropolis. There he views an industrial accident, and has a vision of the vast machines as a temple to the demon Moloch, and the workers as sacrifices. Horrified, he confronts his father, who turns out to be perfectly aware of the appalling work conditions and content to keep things that way. He's more worried about mysterious plans turning up in his workers' clothes. ...continue reading "Metropolis – 1927"
In medieval Prague, the learned Rabbi Löw (Albert Steinrück) predicts that the Jewish Ghetto will be threatened by the Emperor, who wants to drive out or kill the Jews. Sure enough, the Emperor (Otto Gebühr) gives just such a decree to his douchiest knight, Florian (Lothar Müthel). Florian takes the message to the Ghetto, falling in (requited) love with the Rabbi's daughter, Miriam (Lyda Salmonova).
Rabbi Löw builds a man out of clay. With the help of his assistant Famulus (Ernst Deutsch), he summons the dark spirit Astaroth, and force it to give them the magic word to animate the clay man. This word is placed in an amulet which is put around the neck of the clay man and it comes to life as the Golem (Paul Wegener). The Golem is clearly not happy at being ordered around and knocks Famulus over, but Löw discovers that he can deactivate the monster by removing its amulet. ...continue reading "The Golem: How He Came into the World (1920)"
I'll just race through the synopsis of Frankenstein: Day of the Beast. quickly. This is because, while there's lots of running and screaming in this movie, not a lot actually happens. What does happen is pretty icky. Just thought I should warn you. On the other hand, it does give a nice jumping-on point to talk about the character of Elizabeth Lavenza.
Frankenstein is tracking the Monster through the snow with some soldiers. He is seen by the daughter of the old blind man. We have a little look into their family dramas, then the Monster kills them all, the daughter last of all. We see the dying daughter being stitched back together in a darkened room. ...continue reading "Frankenstein: Day of the Beast – 2011"
This is a film that pitches Jackie Chan into a battle to the death with John Cusack.
I thought I'd put that out there to start with. Just so you don't get the idea that this movie isn't stupid. I mean, it's not impossible to imagine a Jackie Chan/John Cusack vehicle – some sort of cross cultural comedy, like Rush Hour, only funny. Chan and Cusack both got their start in eighties movies, maybe you could do a riff on that, only with the silliness of Chan's '80s HK action movie logic impeding on the silliness of Cusack's '80s US teen romance genre. Might be fun.